Random Thoughts while Cleaning FSM

26 Jul

So since we have the prayer room moved to FSM right now, the cleaning teams which normally take care of our little IHOP building are now cleaning the auditorium and multiple bathrooms off of it. It’s not that different from IHOP in some ways, but in others… yeah. Here are some of the things that went through my head while cleaning tonight. Hopefully at least one or two of them will be entertaining. 🙂

The FSM auditorium is pretty stinking big.

The auditorium also has very few power outlets.

Both of the above facts make vacuuming the aforementioned auditorium an exciting challenge. Woman versus machine. Mind over matter. Extension cord versus rows and rows of chairs. And so on and so forth.

If you want to reach all of the floor in the auditorium, there’s no way to do it without unplugging one of the drinking fountains.

People seem to generally go more out of their way to be kind to you when you vacuum at FSM. I think because the vacuum-to-carpet ratio is a bit more startling and evokes more sympathy.

Vacuuming the FSM bleachers is actually kind of fun. A bit silly feeling, but fun.

Vacuuming the FSM bleachers is not as silly feeling as loading one’s car up to the ceiling with boxes of toilet paper to drive ten minutes up the road.

As a girl, it’s somewhat gratifying to hand a couple of boxes of toilet paper to a guy, and have him express surprise at how heavy they are. (It’s not just me!)

The FSM ground floor has more bathrooms than the “real” prayer room. Three more, to be exact.

All five of those bathrooms have easy access to cleaning supplies, which is a definite bonus.

Plunging a toilet is not very much fun.

Plunging a toilet that is…. how shall we say… “ripe”… is really not much fun.

As a girl, plunging a ripe toilet in the men’s room is about as un-fun as it can get.

I have a team of intern cleaners who are really good sports, as well as hard workers. They rock.

Mega props to the people on full-time janitorial staff on the missions base. They also rock. They do this kind of thing for years with excellence and without complaint. I hope I get to hang out in their enormous Millennial mansions one day.


Posted by on July 26, 2007 in Life Happens..., Night Watch, Random


12 responses to “Random Thoughts while Cleaning FSM

  1. Jennifer James

    July 26, 2007 at 10:06 am

    Bless you a thousand fold for working so hard at such a job to make sure we have clean spaces to pray in. You definitely deserve extra crowns in heaven for plunging anything to which the word ‘ripe’ can be applied. THANK YOU!

  2. brianbeattie

    July 26, 2007 at 12:26 pm

    It’s good for you – builds character 😉

  3. Steve Bunkoff

    July 26, 2007 at 4:06 pm

    You would think that here in the 21st century, there would be some kind of pill that could be thrown into a plugged toilet and 2 minutes later it’s cleaned. Perhaps in the millenium. Until then, bless you.
    Personally, I couldn’t live with myself if I was the depositor of such ripeness. I would have to go find a plunger and deal with it myself.

  4. Amanda Beattie

    July 26, 2007 at 4:19 pm

    Jennifer: Aw, thanks. 🙂 And by the way, it was quite fun getting to chat with you yesterday.

    Dad: Good to know. 😉

    Steve: To the magic 21st century pill – if only, if only. To your last two sentences – bless you, sir. This cleaning volunteer thanks you. 😀

  5. xristosdomini

    July 27, 2007 at 5:44 am

    LOL! I’ve had to vacuum the FSM auditorium. Track one after a conference session, I got roped into it by… someone… I don’t remember who… well this story slid downhill fast. As for ripe toilets, the planter should be responsible enough to “harvest” if you catch my DRIFT… although some people get lost trying to follow my FLOW of thought… in fact, I make some faces go FLUSH with consternation… they end up looking like they have constipation… but my randomness makes me smile with Jubulation. Now that I have confused you all, I will bid a fair adieu.


  6. xristosdomini

    July 27, 2007 at 5:45 am

    oh my goodness, was that a haiku? (okay, I’m really done now) **fwooOOOOoooosh**

  7. Amanda Beattie

    July 27, 2007 at 5:54 am

    Oh. My. Gosh.

    No that wasn’t a haiku. But it was amazing. I stand in disbelief that you actually rhymed the word constipation.

    A haiku would be more like:

    Frightening white bowl
    A rubber wand of power
    With which I shall plunge

    (5 syllables / 7 syllables / 5 syllables)

  8. Dorean Beattie

    July 27, 2007 at 7:32 am

    Good grief!

  9. xristosdomini

    July 27, 2007 at 4:33 pm

    lol, the whole haiku thing was to rhyme adieu… I didn’t think of it until after I hit the “reply” button. But yes, that would be a haiku there 5/7/5.


  10. Christine

    July 29, 2007 at 1:48 am

    Once again… I love the Beattie family.

    Oh… and the magic 21st century pill totally exists. I have a box of them in the trunk of my car. You should have said something and I would have gladly shared…

    KIDDING! I have no such pill. But can we agree that the existence of the pill would, at this point, be more infuriating than its nonexistence?

    Seriously… wouldn’t that be so much worse than unclogging a “ripe” toilet? Unclogging a ripe toilet when you could have just dropped a pill in the bowl and left it alone. (Haha… like the person before you did… only they dropped a pile in the bowl and left it alone.)

  11. Christine

    July 29, 2007 at 1:49 am

    Wow. Did I really just say that?

  12. Amanda Beattie

    July 29, 2007 at 2:38 am

    Yes… yes, you did.



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