Comments on: Solitude vs. Isolation

By: Overcoming Loneliness « Meditations by Night

Overcoming Loneliness « Meditations by Night — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 03:19:49 +0000

[...] of our emotional needs get out of whack when we stop seeking it in the right Person. (Remember this post?) Loneliness is a classic example of something we try to solve by hanging around people, but we [...]

By: Various Thoughts on Health and Healing « Meditations by Night

Various Thoughts on Health and Healing « Meditations by Night — Sun, 20 Jan 2008 10:47:30 +0000

[...] but a total loss. For instance, I’ve had a lot of time for silence and solitude. (Remember this post? Yeah. This is not quite what I envisioned.) I’ve been able to jump into some study on [...]

By: Amanda Beattie

Amanda Beattie — Tue, 15 Jan 2008 09:58:09 +0000

bottleman: Thank you for your encouraging comment. I definitely know that finding some alone time is good and necessary, and that spiritual solitude isn’t the only valid kind. But I also know that right now, God is highlighting my need to find rest in Him more than in my circumstances.

Thanks again for commenting!

By: bottleman

bottleman — Tue, 15 Jan 2008 07:07:33 +0000

Amanda, you’re certainly not alone. I for one absolutely crave time by myself and am way too cranky to be good to anyone when I am without it. My family now believes and understands this. I’ve even managed to convince my spouse that getting some time alone for herself is good for her too — she didn’t believe it at first, but now she swears by it.

Anyway, getting time alone is a challenge when you are living in close quarters with people. I think that your resolution to find your alone space in the spiritual realm solely is very bold — and maybe being a bit hard on yourself. You seem to be in a unique social situation (I just came by your blog by chance, so I’m not quite sure I understand it) but I’m sure you’re familiar with the many religious traditions that have recognized that being physically alone can help with spiritual development — what else are monasticism and hermitism about?

So don’t get too down on yourself if you don’t succeed entirely. Perhaps you might arrange a few hours a week for yourself somehow, somewhere. You might not even be “working” on your spiritual quest then. Maybe you’ll just be spacing out. But if you’re like me (and it sounds like you are) it will help you deal with the rest of the week.

Cheers!

By: Amanda Beattie

Amanda Beattie — Thu, 10 Jan 2008 08:57:18 +0000

Odale: I don’t know why, but your comment just now showed up. Weird. Let me actually answer you, then.

There are different seasons where we are more or less involved with people, so it’s good to remember that being alone is not the pitfall; isolation is. It’s when we allow that alone time to act as an artificial shield to (consciously or not) block out our own pain, our insecurities with other people, or even the voice of God, that we hit a big problem. May the Lord connect you with more believers soon!

And yes, since you ask, I am a “muller.” Very much so.

Blessings!

By: Amanda Beattie

Amanda Beattie — Thu, 10 Jan 2008 08:52:05 +0000

I don’t think the solitude bubble is always a bad thing. We introverts do need to have time outs where we can recharge. But when it’s an inner traffic issue… Ouch. Yeah. You and me both.

Thanks for commenting; it’s good to be reminded it’s not just me. :}

By: Jenn S. (a.k.a. Ducky)

Jenn S. (a.k.a. Ducky) — Thu, 10 Jan 2008 04:49:43 +0000

Oof. That hits me where it hurts because I love being alone so much. I tend to create my own solitude bubble by going on hikes by myself. But not only is that not safe in the area we live in, it doesn’t actually silence the inner traffic that you referred to–it’s just pushed beneath the surface for a while. If I come back from a walk with some semblance of peace and then go sit in the prayer room, it vanishes and I come face-to-face with what’s actually going on inside of me.

We can’t create our own rest. We really do have to strive to enter His rest and make ourselves a resting place for Him.

By: Odale

Odale — Thu, 10 Jan 2008 04:21:45 +0000

Thank you for the edification!! I spend 95% of my time alone and it doesn’t bother me except that, as you say, that’s not how we are supposed to live. It’s not deliberate to the degree that it is, I have just learned to tolerate circumstances for now.

You have put a different spin on this situation, though…”relentless inner traffic” and “if my inner serenity depends on external circumstances, I’m sunk”…

Profound thoughts that I will remember and mull over. (Are you a “muller”, as well?;-)

God’s Blessings.